00:00:00: Music.

00:00:10: Very welcome back to a new episode of bitch breathe maybe I shouldn't be calling it bitch breathe anymore because I'm again joined.

00:00:18: By my two Wise Women Sophia and Karina we've already talked about this that maybe maybe.

00:00:24: We might be doing this together a whole lot more often but they'll be more updates on that when the time comes my name is ricardia as I said I'm here with Sofia and Karina and today we are going to talk about.

00:00:37: Corona yes but we're going to take stock and what we would like to.

00:00:41: I think get into a little bit today is what Corona has left behind now I do understand that sounds a little dramatic but I think there's good things that could be said about this very very strangest of times that we've,

00:00:54: hopefully been through I hope I'm using the right tense but we'll see so putting that first question to you girls

00:01:02: what are some of the things that you think you lost and I know you had a very different experience from me who was in Berlin and you were here in Sweden but.

00:01:10: That is exactly why I would love to hear from you what are some of the things you've left behind could be good could be bad could be ugly I think to be honest,

00:01:20: I think we're not the right ones to ask actually because our life this last year has been very different from our normal life because we have just finished

00:01:29: constructing a new house and that process was just overall occupying all our time during that.

00:01:36: Year while I wouldn't say the corona hasn't affected us but maybe not as much

00:01:40: it has affected other people to be honest but yeah what have we lost we're not we don't go out so much we don't go out at at all actually we have actually lost that we can't go to Berlin.

00:01:53: To our apartment I think that that's actually the biggest thing for me that I lost

00:01:59: yeah you divided your time between the two places yes yes so I'm hoping we can start with that again but I think this is the only problem we had.

00:02:13: Was that we got really afraid when the corona hit don't we when we supposed to build the house that.

00:02:21: There was a lot of things that we maybe couldn't get in terms of material and so on so we kind of got a little bit scared.

00:02:29: It all worked out at times of Sweden in general since you were here.

00:02:34: Do you feel like it worked out how the country went about the whole thing I know it's early days yet to get an evaluation but what do you think just speaking from a lay perspective what how do you feel how how Sweden.

00:02:48: I know I know that the rest of the world was looking at Sweden and thinking and also saying that are you crazy the coconut another thing you know because we were not as strict as you were

00:02:59: particular you and Berlin and in Germany and overall in Europe I think you didn't even have a lock down there too I know what this is something that really worries me a bit cuz

00:03:09: was it right or was it wrong to be honest I don't know but as you can.

00:03:13: As you can see right now I think Sweden is doing well when it comes to the level of people being seriously ill and.

00:03:22: I mean we're not even wearing masks here like me I'm always wearing masks in the supermarket and it's still very palpable that we're dealing with some

00:03:31: you know weirdness that feels extraterrestrial and some ways my underwear did have that for a while yeah

00:03:38: yes we did have gloves on and gloves and mice but not for that long but I'm really happy that we.

00:03:46: We built the house during this time this very extraordinary time

00:03:51: I don't think anyone has experienced and you know something like it and I think that's good because since I am the hypochondriac here in the family

00:04:00: could have been occupied with the new symbol in newspapers and looking at Telly and so on but I didn't so because I didn't have the time

00:04:11: and I think that's very good so you're actually coming out of this can I say almost unaffected like now I'm feeling like

00:04:19: how dare they yes yes yes the only thing that I know not unaffected I have been terrified

00:04:28: during periods because I was the one listening to all the news you know I was the one who I didn't do you know for every dog walk I did I was listening to the news and.

00:04:37: Sort of time to tell you everything that was happening anymore no but I don't want to listen try not to listen to Bad News and in fact.

00:04:45: I don't listen to the news at all.

00:04:48: Just goes to do you dude but you also get scared and I don't want to be scared even now though I mean we are talking sort of what covid has left behind you still feel like you're in the thick of this kind of fear.

00:05:00: I don't think it's over yet you see I don't think we ever will get rid of it.

00:05:05: I think it's going to be with us for a long long time we just need to find a way to live with it which we are gradually.

00:05:14: I feel like since I've been vaccinated I'm not going to start a political discussion on vaccine or no vaccine but I've felt more,

00:05:22: safe yes me I don't know what's gonna happen because I had got vaccinated 10 years down the road but to come here and visit you gals and an essential part was that I.

00:05:33: Did I do that and actually that is something I've left behind after the covid is that I thought there's so much fear on such a massive scale that,

00:05:42: I can't be a part of that like at some point you just have to be like okay that's all the fear I can handle at this point so I'm out right and so what that's done is it's even though some things I still struggle with.

00:05:55: I just recently coming from a crying session with your we took action no but what I have done as you know I wrote the book,

00:06:05: The Break-Up call the book about breakups I've linked to it in the show notes.

00:06:10: So I've felt that pressure and I talked to you about this today that I cannot do something,

00:06:16: it's annoying me sometimes now that I can't do anything normal apparently now like now there's this these are unprecedented times I want to do whatever it is I still need to do in this life and it has to be.

00:06:29: Bold and brave because I feel that's what this quality of time has asked me to be is bold and brave.

00:06:37: And so that's something that's covid has left behind which I feel sort of well that sounds good in one way but on the other hand stressful it's been stressful it's been stressful to feel like there's a global crisis.

00:06:50: You try to come out of it in terms of like okay what can we do like to join back the can do kind of attitude and you realize

00:06:57: underlying it there's always a little bit of anxiety still though of course like a quantity of time that I'm wondering is that just going to go away or I don't you see I maybe this is

00:07:08: upsetting to hear but I really liked the state we were in here because

00:07:14: the little bubble yeah the little bubble and also I don't have to see a lot of people and pretend that I like it a lot of people say that and and also what I find,

00:07:27: was very relieving it was all the super calls

00:07:32: because assume meetings because I think you lose so much time especially if we live probably I mean yeah traveling and parking and you know takes forever if you go to a meeting because we live a little bit

00:07:46: outside so you actually think that's a good thing I think it's in Germany where so sick of Zoom calls like we're so

00:07:53: sick of it yeah and I know a lot of people like whoever that may be social anxiety or who never wanted to show up among a whole lot of people in the first place I've heard this a lot,

00:08:02: but for me what I'm noticing and keep in mind your together.

00:08:06: If you were single I think maybe not that single poor poor single people it's not what I mean but I think.

00:08:14: It's different they require a little more interaction maybe sometimes it's just interesting to me that you say,

00:08:21: Zoom is such a relief in here World leg off you are craving it more now I think I am a couple of weeks ago I went to a Congress would loads of people and uh and to this Congress

00:08:33: with loads of people and I had the time of my life I was just thrilled you know I know and I am not the people person in this family,

00:08:41: I could just you know be with other people but I can actually begin to feel that.

00:08:47: I truly enjoy being around people nice I think we need people other people I mean to I think we're hardwired for it yes we are.

00:08:56: So that was a very special thing for me to do to actually get in my car.

00:09:01: I could I couldn't remember how to check into a hotel I was anymore how do I do this where is my suitcase do I have a suitcase and one of what it is expands when I came to you guys.

00:09:15: Where are the people I asked how to get a ticket at this train station

00:09:19: what am I Alice in Wonderland like yeah it's very special experience yeah I have to remind myself that that if we are going to travel somewhere I need to have a new passport because it's expired oh yes you're right

00:09:32: tell her to go to an airport and don't have a I can do to this.

00:09:36: There was something else that was supposed to say when you said yes you see my father my father.

00:09:43: Many years ago he he is little bit known for his dressing style because it's very it's interesting and one Christmas he was opening the door in sweatpants.

00:09:58: And he had a tie on and shirt and jacket and I thought that was a very strange combination and he said yeah but you know.

00:10:06: During Christmas you just sit and eat anyway so nobody sees what you're wearing and I thought that was you know okay

00:10:13: a little bit informal less than formal and now that's normal and now I find myself doing it myself Zoom calls is like whatever,

00:10:22: could be naked which is so addressed yeah zoomed addressed yeah.

00:10:27: Is going to like an office talking about shit that doesn't pertain to my private life

00:10:33: it's just about do the water in the water cooler needs to be replaced or yeah could you get that to me by that and that time like okay that sounds normal I'll do that right and speaking of normal actually I was going to be one of my next question was have we gone back.

00:10:47: To normal I guess for you you've been on a bit of a Hiatus I don't even know like is it different for you but for me I feel like we've somewhat come back to normal in Berlin.

00:10:57: But they're still like an earring - like other is yeah here too I would say I think we are going to be divided into groups here.

00:11:07: Maybe all over the world some people don't give a shit you know is that well yes that's what I'm not giving a shit group,

00:11:16: and the other group are sort of still cautious They Don't Go Near You in the supermarket and I don't they don't shake hands and they don't hug you and know you know I don't know that's sad I just said that nobody likes you anymore

00:11:29: that's kind of sad if we do that in Berlin do you do and I have to say for me.

00:11:35: To a certain degree and I know this is going to sound a little bit maybe responsible so don't do this at home people but for me now that I have the vaccination and I feel safer

00:11:44: the question that comes up is what kind of Life are you protecting if you no longer engaging it in a way that is healthy for you and for me hugs are like super.

00:11:54: Importance like just physical

00:11:57: in general I'm an island girl we like to touch people as soon as we get a chance to look at the legal so it's what we do so for me to be non-physical would be extremely difficult,

00:12:10: it would mean for a going a quality of life that then I ask myself well is if I'm yeah yes like I realize that that sounds like a tremendously risky thing speaking of,

00:12:21: entire variations of this virus but for me at some point that has to be a decision and I made that same decision back in 2001 when the towers came down.

00:12:29: And I was in the Frozen Zone not too far from where it had hit when I remember my husband and I back then.

00:12:35: We both decided okay there's really two choices we can go ahead and live in fear now we were Opening Our mailboxes with rubber gloves,

00:12:42: for a while because Anthrax attacks were starting to happen we didn't realize this correlate and you know what other things are going on and then at some point I realized.

00:12:50: I think it was when another mom was showing me how to put on a gas mask on to my kid oh that I thought yes but I thought I can't do this I realize you need to be prepared you know girl stuff,

00:13:03: yeah but at some point you it's like you've reached a threshold for how much fear you can exactly tolerate and then you just let go yeah you're like okay.

00:13:14: Can't do it anymore and that's where I feel a little bit not quite as much a little bit now think I do too actually I'm trying to think when I buy one time I sort of in a risky.

00:13:25: Place or position and that's probably when you go out shopping in the supermarket because some people they just pay no respect they were close by you and.

00:13:34: But I was in a coffee shop it was mad crowded people didn't seem to have gone out of my way as I please don't Breathe on Me.

00:13:41: Exactly and if your baby out of my face.

00:13:45: I do get nervous when there's a lot of people in a crowded area I do get me yeah me too and then I'm not hugging people on a massive scale I think it's excellent because I've been the people person for so many years and now I'm not anymore,

00:13:59: so I think it's I think it's so relieving so maybe it's brought out our true nature in some ways maybe I do.

00:14:08: I it's horrible but I don't really see I don't see how it has affected me in a.

00:14:14: Bad way really so it's all good you really are the only person I know I'm not kidding I haven't heard a single person say that,

00:14:23: good things ever good things yes but that they don't feel it has affected them in a negative way like what you said this have never heard that's amazing to me yeah but it is of course insular,

00:14:35: it's because of your your building yes and I think also the people who know me as I mean especially you you

00:14:43: also know that I have been struggling a little bit this year was it this year it was last year well it's been a long as two years almost two years.

00:14:55: It was a welcome time out almost yes and also I couldn't really focus on Corona.

00:15:01: Also I was you know occupied with myself it but I mean I think not turning inward at all at this time would.

00:15:09: For me a little bit like you failed enough to take an opportunity they're exactly like that I think this this.

00:15:17: This was an opportunity to look inside and be like okay I don't know that I want all of what was before back like you're saying now and I think it's perfectly fine to say yeah I'm good yeah you know yeah I don't.

00:15:31: I mean I'm glad to hear it because you're my friend of course but also because.

00:15:37: It's been so hard to not have that around like anyone I called in Berlin sometimes I thought of Jesus Christ can I call anyone without there being,

00:15:44: more bad news other than the Corona right so I don't thrive on people doing as badly or worse than I do myself so that's actually a really I find it inspiring.

00:15:54: To not want to have everything that was before,

00:15:57: go back to that what about you Karina is there a back to normal not really not really I mean I still have this.

00:16:04: Fear inside on me that it will come back or we do I do yes but it come back it's here.

00:16:12: Yeah but I mean come back A variation of sorts racial like the Delta virus like you know can still hit us who don't say that okay I didn't say that you forgot that still hit us but I mean it's not over.

00:16:25: I don't think you'd ever will be I think we're going to have to take the shots every year

00:16:30: I feel like the worst is over I don't know if I'm telling myself stories I'm not sure hmm I mean none of us knows this is one of those things where you're like your history is going to have to tell us exactly this is everything else is speculation vaccine good vaccine bad we don't know

00:16:44: we don't know we just don't know so soon we'll get to know I think a future I think the main thing that I sort of bring with me.

00:16:51: If you look at what what's what has this brought to me it's more a feeling of how important people are to you or to me or to all of us,

00:17:00: we need other people and they can be different answers to that like Sophia says you know what I don't need so many which I think is perfectly legit me I'm like

00:17:09: I can also get along with not seeing people every day I don't need to but I'm like for example I really missed you you couldn't come to Berlin I know and that was very hard for me or not being able to come here because I wanted to wait for the vaccination whatever,

00:17:23: I agree that I don't need to see all day people all day every day of varying degrees of importance to me because I also noticed sometimes when I'm in a crowded area it's actually the.

00:17:32: It's too much sometimes now but I miss proximity and just having at least the freedom that it's okay to be close to people.

00:17:43: And that I don't fully have back yet like I still feel like.

00:17:46: Yeah that's hesitant when I have my mom I do it now because we're both vaccinated but it's frustrated there in your mind yeah.

00:17:54: It's still the same and especially for younger people like my son as you know he's 21 and then.

00:17:59: You have children also in the 30s these are young I still consider these young people and I do sort of feel like.

00:18:06: It's at least nice for them that they feel like they can go back to a certain degree of.

00:18:10: Closeness and study together being a same lecture hall together whatever so that for me has been important but hey I have a father who's not vaccinated so I think that's complicated and I'm going to

00:18:24: I'm going to have the talk with him do you know it would be horrible if I gave him the virus but it's like he doesn't say that he did.

00:18:32: My father is very special but he's he's afraid he's afraid of the vaccine and his support of my do doctors and so on it doesn't take any type of medicine.

00:18:45: I never had I don't think he ever had an aspirin reimagine no never in his life,

00:18:51: no I don't think so wow I don't know but that also is women who have like regular pain as a house that an option assessable to have some survival proven or something you know so.

00:19:03: Last question just to sort of round this up what is one thing going forward let's say we are in a post-pandemic world.

00:19:12: What is one thing you would like to see either return.

00:19:16: Or change now that we've been through Collective crisis so it could be something you want to see or something you don't want to see return or renew I mean this is out of my control obviously but one thing that really stuck with me.

00:19:30: When you have read about the pandemic the the small amount I have read about it is that all the domestic violence has increased.

00:19:40: And I think that's horrible I think that's absolutely horrible and that France had a secret code for women,

00:19:46: in the emergency room yeah I think that's horrible and obviously those men are not going to stop.

00:19:55: When the pandemic is over but I really really hope that.

00:20:00: The visibility might increase again that this is happening yes yes I just feel very uneasy when I think about that.

00:20:08: What about you I just wish we could go back to traveling again.

00:20:12: I miss traveling I just love to travel and go places and and I don't know if I ever will have that kind of feeling of joy to do that I think I would,

00:20:22: probably feel guilty or maybe afraid too or I don't know I don't think it will ever be the same to travel do you really just so guilty.

00:20:32: No but like you know okay is this a stupid thing to do now or will there be like an outbreak in that country or but you traveled so much so maybe.

00:20:42: Maybe maybe don't think that's hot dogs troubling I think the more you travel the more you want to travel in some ways like for me it's not so much the,

00:20:52: being scared of be getting sick but I feel like the whole climate change debate,

00:20:58: which shouldn't be a debate but unfortunately it is got amped up so much they were so many protests and all these kids my son's age just super woke superconscious with all of this I can't easily.

00:21:12: Take long distance flights or you know go to Barcelona for the weekend anymore I don't see myself doing that my travel my way of traveling I came here by train which I mostly did whenever I came to visit you but still there's not going to be.

00:21:26: The Weekend in Paris like five times a year or yeah there's not.

00:21:30: I don't see myself do it's going to be a Night Train to Paris which could be romantic but that's changed for me not that I wasn't aware of climate change before but now I'm like.

00:21:40: I couldn't do it I feel like I'm a heathen you are here maybe I am sometimes all right anyway that was it from bitch Bri thank you Sofia thank you Korina for being here.

00:21:53: And we'll hear from you next time hopefully if you want to write to us it's bitch breathe at gmail.com

00:22:00: the i in bitch was a number one yay thank you thank you all for being here sending love see you soon again thank you bye.

00:22:10: Music.